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You got to be careful if you don\'t know where you\'re going, because you might not get there.
The cynics are right nine times out of ten.
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I don\'t want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.
The cry has been that when war is declared, all opposition should be hushed. A sentiment more unworthy of a free country could hardly be propagated.
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The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.
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Humor is just another defense against the universe.
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The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there\'s no law against whacking them around a bit.
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I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.
A poem is never finished, only abandoned.
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Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.
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We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
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Is your argument that the Creator of the Universe was working under a deadline and His manager forced Him to rush inefficient designs into production?
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Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
People who think they know everything greatly annoy those of us who do.
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.
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Black holes are where God divided by zero.
Programming is one of the most difficult branches of applied mathematics; the poorer mathematicians had better remain pure mathematicians.
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Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
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Total absence of humor renders life impossible.
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Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis.
It\'s not the size of the dog in the fight, it\'s the size of the fight in the dog.
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Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.
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There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
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Whether you think that you can, or that you can\'t, you are usually right.
It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood... War is hell.
Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism.
The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.
Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.
Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent\'s eye, that charms to destroy...
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The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a \'C\', the idea must be feasible.
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One doesn\'t have a sense of humor. It has you.
Attention to health is life\'s greatest hindrance.
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you\'ll be happy; if not, you\'ll become a philosopher.
Misunderstandings and neglect create more confusion in this world than trickery and malice. At any rate, the last two are certainly much less frequent.
Everybody\'s worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there\'s a really easy way: stop participating in it.
Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
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If you\'re sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign.
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.
Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
Computer /nm./: a device designed to speed and automate errors.
For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.
I Can\'t Think Of Anything Reasonable To Counter Your Argument Or Don\'t Have The Least Inkling Of The Subject So I Will Resort To Name Calling And Hope I Can Get Away With It.
In any contest between power and patience, bet on patience.
Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.
If it wasn\'t for C, we\'d be writing programs in BASI, PASAL, and OBOL.
Mother-in-law = A woman who destroys her son-in-law\'s peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers.
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I\'ve never tried before.
No mention of God. They keep Him up their sleeves for as long as they can, vicars do. They know it puts people off.
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DOS Computers manufactured by companies such as IBM, Compaq, Tandy, and millions of others are by far the most popular, with about 70 million machines in use worldwide. Macintosh fans, on the other hand, may note that cockroaches are far more numerous than humans, and that numbers alone do not denote a higher life form.
You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I\'ve only ever had one.
There\'s many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI?!
Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent\'s eye, that charms to destroy...
What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.
About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.
Paramount among the responsibilities of a free press is the duty to prevent any part of the government from deceiving the people.
Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.
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Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.
Don\'t drive me crazy -- it\'s within walking distance.
It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.
I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass.
Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.
Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.
The internet is not something you just dump something on. It\'s not a truck. It\'s a series of tubes!
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.
If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?
Don\'t drive me crazy -- it\'s within walking distance.
There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal.
The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
As the post said, \'Only God can make a tree,\' probably because it\'s so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
Maybe this world is another planet\'s Hell.
Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.
The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.
All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.
Imitation is the sincerest form of television.
I was raised in the West. The west of Texas. It\'s pretty close to California. In more ways than Washington, D.C., is close to California.
Research is what I\'m doing when I don\'t know what I\'m doing.
A terrorist is someone who has a bomb, but doesn\'t have an air force.
In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it\'s the exact opposite.
If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check.
The only one listening to both sides of an argument is the neighbor in the next apartment
Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.
I have an existential map; it has \'you are here\' written all over it.
If you can read this you\'re not aiming in the right direction.
One doesn\'t have a sense of humor. It has you.
2 + 2 = 5, for extremely large values of 2.
Mr. Wagner has beautiful moments but bad quarters of an hour.
The Bible was a consolation to a fellow alone in the old cell. The lovely thin paper with a bit of matress stuffing in it, if you could get a match, was as good a smoke as I ever tasted.
The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.
Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
I must confess, I was born at a very early age.
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I don\'t pray because I don\'t want to bore God.
Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.
It\'s dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that\'s successful enough to require a large and complex set of software
Biologically speaking, if something bites you it\'s more likely to be female.
Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?
I don\'t approve of political jokes... I\'ve seen too many of them get elected.
Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
Copy from one, it\'s plagiarism; copy from two, it\'s research.
I don\'t know anything about music. In my line you don\'t have to.
It\'s not the size of the dog in the fight, it\'s the size of the fight in the dog.
Build a man a fire, and he\'ll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he\'ll be warm for the rest of his life.
If you haven\'t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.
Real life is that big, high-res, high-color screen saver behind all the windows.
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Misunderstandings and neglect create more confusion in this world than trickery and malice. At any rate, the last two are certainly much less frequent.
I begin by taking. I shall find scholars later to demonstrate my perfect right.
It\'s strange, isn\'t it. You stand in the middle of a library and go \'aaaaagghhhh\' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.
Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don\'t have it.
No mention of God. They keep Him up their sleeves for as long as they can, vicars do. They know it puts people off.
It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.
The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it
The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.
Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.
I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.
If it weren\'t for electricity we\'d all be watching television by candlelight.
You\'re about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.
I\'ve always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.
Statistics is like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive. What they conceal is vital.
When I am dead, I hope it may be said: \'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.
... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
If everything seems under control, you\'re just not going fast enough.
The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.
If it wasn\'t for C, we\'d be writing programs in BASI, PASAL, and OBOL.
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
They laughed when I said I\'d be a comedian. They aren\'t laughing now.
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
The truth is more important than the facts.
How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.
The cry has been that when war is declared, all opposition should be hushed. A sentiment more unworthy of a free country could hardly be propagated.
It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one\'s doubts.
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
A camel is a horse designed by a committee
The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows.
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Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-Box.
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one\'s work is terribly important.
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I\'ve never tried before.
Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
Why don\'t they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.
All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
I think \'Hail to the Chief\' has a nice ring to it.
The competent programmer is fully aware of the limited size of his own skull. He therefore approaches his task with full humility, and avoids clever tricks like the plague.
Barab?si\'s Law of Programming: Program development ends when the program does what you expect it to do ? whether it is correct or not.
One doesn\'t have a sense of humor. It has you.
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.
It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims.
If it wasn\'t for C, we\'d be writing programs in BASI, PASAL, and OBOL.
I just bought a Mac to help me design the next Cray.
If you haven\'t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.
We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
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Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/26/(Thu) 10:27
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